Sunday, May 30, 2010

Die Another Day....
I set out for my brick the other day thinking that this is going to be so much fun! I'm so excited to get outside and ride....I have a gorgeous day for it! Yayayayay! And it was....Fun! The ride went ok....not as good as I would have liked....but I was just a bit off from where I would like to be time wise...and for the most part I felt pretty good. I rode along pretty steady....I did have a bit of trouble keeping my cadence up as high as I was supposed to but I know I just need to get a few more rides in outside...and it will come....
I was doing an out and back ride....I've found that if I ride straight out on the road that I live on that I don't have much traffic to deal with...and that even though I have quite a few stop signs that I can usually see really good both ways and sail right through them. I reached my turn around...and back I went....still feeling really good....rode for a few more miles....and then it happened....I felt a solid little thump on my helmet....hmmmm....that must have been a large fly? Then I started to hear a unmistakable buzzing! OH MY GOD NOOOOONOOOO!!!!! I slammed on the brakes and hopped off the bike and was unsnapping that helmet really really quick! Not quick enough though.....I felt the stinging pain of a extremely unhappy honey bee. I now had the helmet off....and was hoping that the bee would just fall off and be done with me....NOPE! He was stuck in my hair and seemed to be burying himself even more! I must have looked like a completely totally insane person....hitting myself in the head...and ripping through my hair....OUCH! Now that that was done back to biking home...I had a run to do!
Off I went again....praying that I wouldn't encounter any more insects....About 2 miles from home I glanced up to see a huge billowing cloud of dust headed my way....Oh great.....We are in the middle of planting season here in Northwest Ohio and a farmer was driving along at about 30-40 mph through his dust bowl of a field....I thought no big deal I'll just speed it up and hold my breath till I get through the cloud....Then I noticed the smell of ammonia! He was not just causing a storm of dirt but he was spraying....UGH! One of the many reasons that I hate Ohio...I know I chose to live here! Completely my fault! But really I can't wait to move! So here I am out being all healthy and biking and well there is nothing like inhaling ammonia while exercising! How ironic huh?
Then I was home! Yay! Hurry get changed and head back out! I grabbed some water...pulled my hat on and off I went. I was surprised....I didn't expect to feel my legs so wobbly. I have felt a little rubbery before heading out...but this was different. I felt like I had nothing under me....I usually find that my legs move a little faster off the bike and that I have trouble slowing down....instead I felt like I couldn't get them moving the more I tried the more I hurt...and the more I felt myself gasping for air....I thought, no big deal I'll just keep plugging along and it will quit after a 1/2 a mile to a mile....instead I found myself fighting to stay running....I was out....all out! I had nothing left to long 9 min miles that I was supposed to be doing....I found myself clinging to a 10 min. mile not very successfully at that....The only time that I did come close to that 9 min mile? I had a very angry black lab snarling at me! That did it I found a little extra left in me....and then I almost gave up! I had been stung....inhaled things I shouldn't have....and now I have a dog trying to kill me! I found way too many negative thoughts of how do I do this....I won't be able to do a tri...I mean if I can't even bike and run....hahaha let's add a swim onto this! What are you thinking! It's going to be even hotter in July! I tried to stop the thoughts....wasn't very successful....and then I started to hear Madonna's Die Another Day...."I going to wake up! I'm going to close my body now! I guess I'll die another day...another day! I think I'll find another way! I'm going to suspend my senses!" My knees weren't hurting...I wasn't doing any damage....I was just sore and tired....and that was ok....I needed to shut my body up and mostly shut up my head! I realized that I am expecting to do this without feeling like it's hard...and it's not going to happen! I need to close my body and close my mind and put my head down and hurt!
While I'm glad that my day off is coming....and my recovery week is coming....and I'm going to enjoy every minute of it.... I'm ready to wake up, close my body, find another way, suspend my senses, and die another day....July 4th is looking like a good day for that right now...(my tri is the 3rd). So here goes another month of really hard work and fighting for what I started fighting for many months ago! I'm looking forward to showing my next brick what I'm really made of! Lulu


  1. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it - that's what I tell myself on a tough run.

    That bee sounds horrible! Well done for keeping going!

  2. Oh my gosh, can't believe you got a bee in your hair! What a day.